you see my art teacher doesnt like me, my best friend is bugging me, I lost my 18 necklace my sister got me it went down the drain in the shower v.v, i forgot my permission form for school i offered a compromise but no so i decided i'd go home the h.o.d followed me though the school but left me alone once i got to the gate *sigh* i should have stayed but i was too upset to put up with that kinda shit from school im sooo sick of it. my stupid computer wont fucking let me use iTunes so im going isane right now im on youtube listening to songs T-T cos itunes is fucked my friend said he could fix it i've asked him 4-5 timers can u fix my computer 'yeah sure' but he always has an excuse so im getting really pissed he was supposed to come over yesterday and fix it but he didnt he didnt even so much as text me 'sry cant make it' would that be sooo hard? i've been eating too much junk food i've got horric stomach aches and gas 'yuck' oh and of course because i forgot somthing mum's gone out ugh she's always going out when im at school and need her im getting stress headaches again my stomach is soooore i'm feeling victimised again everyone else gets to bend and brake the rules but not me never me i get in trouble whenever i've been happy or having fun. is that mum? no of course not stupid me,
i've been trying soooo sooo hard to not get in trouble and now this happens i really hope my fucking certificates are worth all this pain and suffering ((_))) i made one slip up and that will look sooo bad on my school records v.v hah....... but im home now and im feeling better my kitty was in my arms purring for me i still love Zero by 柯有倫 mum's gonna be really mad at me so i've gotta chill out until she comes home it wont be as bad as they make it out to be there just trying to scare me into conforming to there standard and im sooo sick of cos they dont do this to my best friend they just let things go or make up an excuse its really jut not fair......................

*sigh* oh i bough a double eyeliner today black n white and erm it got blunt and i tried to sharpen it and well lets just say it didn't go very well T-T i need makeup training :[ mum's getting me some cheap eyeliners from a cheap shop so i can practice hehehehe.....................im feeling very embarrassed and my boy friend was buggin me today about i don't wanna brake up im like kinda really pissed at him cos he has a lot of issues and he sometimes hurts me during sex T-T and we have sex when he's in the mood not when i want to and i sometimes feel dirty after he has v.v i told his best friend this and a few other things and he had no idea jode was like that *giggles* oh and last night after i broke up with and Vince he's my best friend but eventually worked his way into the relationship between me and jode anyway i told him it was enough too but jode's always had a boy friend or even a girlfriend i dont think he's ever gotten over his first love he has alot of love to grieve and he wants commitment ahhhhh anyway after i told jode we were over i went over to my friend vanity's house she kinda looks like my twin we play games on ppl cos of it hehe anyways she said something about being a 'natural brunette' so i decide to check XD anyways after that i went home again i fell asleep way later than mum would have been happy about and i cried about the break up i eventually fell asleep cuddling my teddy bear and our narrators "the girls" told me that jode was cuddling a teddy too after bawling his eyes out anyway he was cuddling his bear he named after me awes T-T im gonna call him now but im not taking him back until he solves his issues so if he really loves he'll have to face his demons

I wait all week for you, we both go to school and I go to work on Fridays but i cant help but always want you here by my side i lay awake at night wishing you were lying here behind me holding me close and making me feel the way i should i get so lonely sometimes that i lay in my bed and cry tears no one will ever know about and none ever hears i just cant help but feel my despair eating away at my lonely soul when you not here next to me im so sorry i make you sad when you find out i feel this way i just cant help it i love you jodie bear and i just cant stop feeling like this...... T_T ((_)))

i had a great birthday my sister called and even gave me a hug and she gave me birthday presents also i had to put up with my dad going on and on ur growing up soo much blah blah blah and like ppl at school are being really nice to me too that 18th birthday necklace be serve as a huge luck charm x3 yay for meee anyways all my friends said happy birthday so im happy oh and none of the teachers told me to take off my necklace i don't think they noticed but anyway

i may always seem to be moody and miserable but deep in side im almost anyways containing the smallest flame of happiness it flickers so close to going out but still springs back every time something upsets me

LMAO where ia m its the day after my birthday but on Da it says it still is timezones are sooo funny

i found a reason to go on i found final fantasy 13 , agito and some other one its just like how tetsuya nomura spread out kingdom hearts IE 1, 2 final mix chain of memories birth by sleep kh3 and i think there's more but im not sure right now im happy but i have to wait a long time and endure tafe and working a s a cabinet maker for a fair while so that the ps3 will come down in price and so i can buy it and the games by then the games will be platinum >.< and the game's not even out til next year T-T